Where Dafaq Did the Year Go – 2018 Edition

Every January, I come up with a buttload of good intentions to live my life better.
Every July, I suddenly get chest pains about not having gotten anything done.
By September, I completely give up and call my life a failure.
By December, I’ve convinced myself that the next year is going to be My Year.

This year is not very different, I’m gearing up to label my life a failure.

But I do seem to have not spent all of the six months that have gone by sitting on my couch and half-watching random episodes of things I should have watched a long time ago, while trying hard not to engage with abusive fuckbois on Ludo Online.

What I HAVE done includes (but is not limited to):

  • Reading 48 books (I’m still behind on my Goodreads challenge but wtf? this is the most I’ve ever read in my adult life :O. And very less crap too, 90% of the books have been 3 stars at the very least). For someone who found it difficult to “find time” to read in 2014, I’ve come a long way
  • Posting 182 photos on Instagram for my Project 365. Oh man, I can’t even. For someone who has had major commitment issues with any kind of posting anywhere (if you followed my old blog, you’d know the number of projects I’ve started and dropped), this is MAJOR progress. I have hope for me yet 😛
  • Starting to save (HOLY CANOLI WHO AM I). Despite making a couple of extravagant choices, I have savings, bruh, SAVINGS 😀
  • Writing (hello new blog). I wrote for the heck of it, when I wanted to, about what I felt like. While nothing I wrote is literary genius, the exercise made me happy. I looked forward to what little engagement that happens, rather than being driven to anxiety. I didn’t constantly refresh the stats page, nor felt pressure to return comments/follows. AND I LOVE IT. This is what I started blogging for, and I’m glad I found my way back to this feeling, despite everything. Nothing else works for me. And I owe almost all of this courage/epiphany/resolve to one single blog: Gobblefunksite
  • Buying my first bottle of good whisky. After 3-4 years of swinging wildly between whisky-habit-is-for-rich-people chindiness or paying 400 bucks for 30 diluted ml of liquor at pubs, it feels like I have arrived, really 😀
  • Getting promoted. Not my first but I have “senior” added to my title now as a reward for slogging for ungrateful corporates for 5 years. It doesn’t mean much in the bigger picture, but you know, cheap thrills

What I have failed miserably at:

  • Fixing my relationship with food. Q2 2018 has been tough, mental health wise and I’m eating my feelings, starting from one end and coming out through the other, and this is ruining all my progress 😥 Any advice for me?
  • Yelling less. Oh man, this Shy set me off this path late last year and come January, I resolved to not vent my spleen when something went wrong, but I’ve to report that I’ve crashed and burned spectacularly at this multiple times
  • Swearing less. With a new baby in the family, I’m so so conscious of how much I cuss, and I can’t seem to get a handle on it. Rather, I try only when I’m around said baby. I really need to stop before she swears at her parents and tells them I taught her to, and then her parents proceeding to disown me
  •  Journaling. I started at the beginning of the year and burned out by mid-March. I want to restart it, but the fact that three months’ worth will be missing from it in the middle is making the Type A in me not restart it *rolls eyes so hard*

There are other points under both headings but these are the highlights. Can’t wait to see what else makes me bawl and what I kick some serious ass at.

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Spring Cleaning…

…. or 5 things to divest right now.

TLDR: Unsubscribe from all spammy mails and online shopping links; sell/donate/throw out everything you don’t touch or use on a daily basis; unspam you media storage app/device; unclog your headspace; and get rid of toxic people.

5) E-mails: I get 30 mails a day and 29 go straight to spam. Doesn’t help that Yahoo! Mail’s spam filter (yes, I still use Yahoo! Mail) sucks donkey balls. Plus I get mails every five minutes from every site I have ever been on saying that there is this AMAZING sale on everything I ever wanted in my life and, invariably, I end up with a major case of FOMO (this is not that bad, considering e-mail marketing is how people end up impulse buying a buttload of clothes, stationery, whatnot that they SO don’t need (refer next point). Sit yourself down one Sunday morning, take 15 minutes to unsubscribe from everything you do not actively read on a regular basis. And give yourself the gift of an primary inbox that is not clogged like a BBMP septic tank.

4) Possessions: You don’t need five different types of black kurtas, or three different types of ladles in your kitchen drawer. You don’t need that myeah book you got sent for review or backup curtains for your backup curtains. No, you don’t. You don’t even need three different kinds of pickles and that wall hanging you absolutely love. You really, really don’t. Why? Because, in this day and age, we buy things because companies tell us that we need seven different types of workout bras before joining the gym and six types of matched crockery to be a good host. They tell us we need beard wax and beard oil and deodorant and under eye gels, when we REALLY don’t.

There is a liberating feeling that comes with not owning too many material things. And the savings! Just calculate the amount of money you’ve spent since January 2018 on things that you didn’t absolutely need, I’m sure you can probably afford a holiday on that. This in itself should be motivation enough, no?

If you want to take this one step further, look into minimalism. It isn’t sanyasa, like it is made out to be. You can choose to adapt the concept into a system that works for you and the life you want for yourself and the family.

3)  Data: Go to your phone’s picture viewer and tell me how many pictures are there. And then tell me how many of those are repeats of the same thing because you were trying to get the right angle or focus. Now, plug in your HDD and tell me how much data it has. And now tell me when was the last time each folder was opened. Then go back into your phone and take a good, hard look at your apps, tell me which ones you have used in the last six months.

Just because our devices are capable of holding what-feels-like an infinite amount of data, doesn’t mean you have to carry it around as well, completely oblivious to the fact that you have seven differently named versions of the same song, or three copies of the same book in different folders, or even five videos out of which only one actually is of your pet/friend/child/food and the others have shaky fingers, half-covered lenses, and you screeching in the background. Or is it that you like laggy devices?

See where I am going with this? GET.RID.OF.IT.

2) Baggage: Look, life is hard. For everyone. And we get hurt. Everyone does. It seems to me that accumulating emotional baggage is unavoidable. But just like you clean out the house or your space every once in a while, sit down, take a few minutes, and fix your head space. Trying to find, name, assess, and acknowledge every emotion in your head can go a long, long way in making it easier for you to deal with every day existence, and by extension, with other relationships. And letting go of baggage can really be the difference between connecting with new people in a meaningful way and being stuck in a loop of loneliness, mistrust, and low self-esteem.

1) People: If they are not adding value to your life, one way or the other, let them go. One step further, if they are causing you to doubt yourself, if they are bringing you down, if they are giving you advice you didn’t specifically ask for, let them go yesterday. Friends are wholesome, fun, dependable, and entirely unconditional. They don’t have rules, they don’t over analyze the curt messages you send when you’re PMSing or in a meeting, and they are ALWAYS in your corner, whether you’re starting a new business or a blog.

Yes, this breed exists.
Yes, you deserve to have them in your life and
BE this friend to other people because that is even more rewarding (IMO).

***

You take one look at this list and tell me that its easier said than done, I will tell you I’d never ask you to do something I haven’t tried myself. It is hard. Tackling even one of these things is a mammoth task by itself, but I can honestly tell you that, over time, I’ve tried them all, and so I know it is not impossible.

You put in the work, I promise you it will most certainly be worth it.